I decided that I wanted to cut my hair shorter. This is after Nick has recently complained that my hair keeps getting shorter each month even though he has told me that he does not like short hair. I thought I would be respectful and ask his opinion before making the cut. I showed him a picture of what I was thinking of doing the night before my appointment. His response was, "Why are you even asking my opinion when you know my answer?"
This discussion carried into the next day as I tried to get his blessing for my new do. Nick was refusing to give his "blessing" and the more I begged for his blessing the more up upset he got. The discussion was via phone and then via IM. Bad choice on my part. Most heated discussions that I have with Nick are shared with my BFF. She is my sense of reason at times like this when I really don't understand Nick's point of view. So, Nick and I were discussing the cut via IM and, in my opinion, his arguments were a little over the top. I told him that it was just hair and shouldn't be a big deal. To that, he told me that he was going to grow a comb over. The "discussion" continued. This is where it went south. I was having a conversation via IM with my BFF at the same time as my discussion with Nick. Since our conversation was getting so out of hand, I attempted to cut and paste it into my BFF conversation so she could see how stupid we were being. When I hit paste, I realized that I cut and pasted my conversation with Nick back into my conversation with Nick instead sharing it with my BFF. Nick's not a dumb guy and I knew immediately that he would know what I was trying to do. It went something like this:
Nick: what are you doing
Ashley: nothing
Nick: why did you just cut and paste our conversation?
Ashley: I was trying to scroll up
Nick: who were you trying to share it with
Ashley: no one
Nick: whatever.
Ashley: really, I wasn't sharing it
Nick: don't lie to me
Ashley: I was going to share it with Jessica, but I changed my mind
Nick: I'm done
Ashley: Please don't be mad at me. I'm sorry
Nick: You lied
Ashley: No, I changed my mind. I didn't share it with her
Nick: Yeah, when you paste the conversation into the wrong window, it can change your mind pretty quickly
Yeah, I'm stupid! I know it. I can't lie and when I do, I get caught because I suck at lying. Ask my parents, I've never been good at it. I called Nick and tried to make things better. It didn't really help because he was mad at me for not telling him the truth. I was still trying to get his blessing to cut my hair. He told me that I can cut it if I want but just know that he finds me less attractive with short hair.
I left work and was on my way to Blush, still not knowing what I was going to do. I decided to compromise. I didn't go as short as I wanted so he would still find me sort of attractive.
I shared Nick's statement with my mom later. She told me that I must have pretty high confidence since that didn't bother me. I told her that I know he was just saying whatever he thought would make me change my mind. I think short hair can be sexy hot. Isn't it really how your hair makes you feel anyway?
Even Miss Rachel McAdams has short hair!
12 comments:
In my opinion, the problem with this situation is that you feel it necessary to get Nick's blessing for the way YOU want to wear YOUR hair. Is Nick being contollling? No, I don't think so. I think he is being honest with you when you ask him a question. He likes long hair. He would prefer that you wear yours long. Does he have to take care of it? Nope. Does he have to look at it 24/7? Nope. Is he going to stop loving you just because you cut your hair short? OH NO!!! My feeling is that you should wear your hair the way it makes you feel good and be done with it. Quit begging for a blessing and go with it. You are a beautiful woman, both inside and out, and you can cut your hair or let it grow out - it's your choice. End of sermon......
Why do men love long hair? I have never quite understood this. Ryan would love for my hair to be long too, but I just can't stand it long and when it is long I usually pull it back anyway. I say its your hair do what you want, and if he wants a comb over then you must post pictures so we can all laugh!
Oh and I don't think it matters how your hair looks you are very pretty, so I think you could shave your head and you will pull it off. It isn't about hair its attitude and you exude beauty!!
I just need to say, she asked my opinion on the situation, I told her the truth. She can do whatever she wants to do with her hair. I still will love her and think she is gorgeous, however I do LOVE long hair! Especially a pony tail.
Ashley, your father-in-law always wanted my hair to be long too. I tried it once and hated it. Short hair is so much easier to take care of. Talking of hair, Nick shaves his head, so how can he not like "short hair"?!? I loved his thick, curly hair when he was younger, but I love him just as much since he has shaved his head. It's OK for him to give you his opinion, and I know he loves you dearly with short or long hair.
Love Ya'
Okay, my turn. I side with Nick on this one. Sorry, Ash. Shame on all of you who beat him up over this. Josh and I went to a "hot, holy sex seminar" once and in it, they made the point that your husband is the one who has to look at you every day. What a way to show him respect to ask his opinion (go Ashley!). Josh is the reason my hair stays long and light blond despite the fact that I admire the short chic new dos. Gals, leave Nick alone, he's entitled to his opinion, especially when he's asked!
Angela
I agree that Nick is allowed his opinion and if you ask then he should be honest. Nick, good for you for being honest even though you knew what she wanted to hear. There is nothing wrong with having ones own opinion thats what makes life interesting. I just feel that even with that opinion you should do what makes you feel good about yourself. So can anyone explain the men/long hair issue? I still don't quite understand what it is about long hair...
Have any of you noticed that Nick is the only male who has commented on this issue? Maybe men can't explain why they like long hair, they just do. Isn't it in the Bible somewhere, about women and long hair? Or was that Samson and Delilah I'm thinking of (and that was Samson's long hair). I want to make it clear that I wasn't beating Nick up for having an opinion. I totally respect him for telling Ashley exactly what he thinks when he's asked his opinion. I think that the way one wears one's hair has to be a "mutual agreement" between a man and a woman. Whether it's the man or the woman trying to decide what style is most appealing to his/her partner, there must be mutual respect and agreement. That's what was lacking in my marriage and we all know where that ended up! End of second sermon...........
Aunt Carolyn,
Your the best. I love reading your comments becaue you always have a great way of looking at things. Hope you are feeling great!
I must say never thought a post about Ashley's haircut would get this much attention...10 comments! I am pretty sure if you were bald Nick would still love you 110%. I say go for it!
Hmmmm I wonder what nick said and why it was removed. Isn't anyone else wondering this. In the biblical times women with short hair and men with long hair were identified as prostitutes. Maybe thats why guys like the hair long.
Josh
Ok, I just can't help but leave a comment on this posting. I find it pretty sad that Nick bases your attractiveness on the length of your hair. Coming from someone who is completely bald and has undergone months of chemotherapy, a comment like that is undeserving. I would hate to think of what Nick would say if you were bald like me. I'm pretty sure he would be more "accepting" of your short haircut. Ryan has never found me more attractive than now. Bald is Beautiful.
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